I remember my mother introducing me to her friends and smiling when they commented on how pretty her little girl was. She had dreams of me being a movie star one day. Then I grew into an ugly stage as a teen and I could see the disappointment on her face when glimpses of future stardom vanished into thin air. I learned from a young age how a woman can make her children into personal trophies and create confusion in their spirit.
In raising my sons I had to learn to let them have their own process to hear God and determine their values. They needed to break free of what I expected them to believe. Thank God my two boys were not easily manipulated and they had the capacity to discern truth. They observe life and they won’t do things just because everyone else does it. I remember my older son challenging me and saying, “Why do you get so upset when we challenge ideas? It’s like you’re not sure because if you were really sure you would not feel the need to be so defensive! If it’s the truth we will find it. Do you not trust that?”
My younger son recently watched the movie Spotlight and I could tell what he was thinking. He’s not easily impressed by people with spiritual resumes, he watches their lives. And so it is with many in their twenties. They are not impressed with a title, they want to see authenticity.
As a leader of a mega Christian women’s ministry there are times I feel tempted to use my kids as trophies. I want what they do to reflect positively on me. But God reminds me they weren’t created for me they were created for Him. God also reminds me the time I found my path was when I no longer lived to be my mother’s trophy but to find my own identity under Christ. So that’s what I try to do for my sons. They must have the freedom to work their own process and settle their convictions. And I must trust that the same God who led me to truth is leading my sons. He is faithful from one generation to the next. How are you trusting God with the next generation?